"Gérard's Casserole"
A Flintloque Scenario by Steve Blease
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Colonel Etienne Gérard, currently in command of the 10e Crown Hussars, must escort the vivacious Ferach Vivandière, Néjellar Lauson, back to the lines of the Grande Armée across a desolate frozen wasteland teeming with Undead.
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Colonel Etienne Gérard was hungry, in fact he was starving. Surveying the windswept snowdrifts of the Witch-Lands he could feel the pangs of hunger attacking his stomach. Putting his spy glass back in his pouch his hand brushed the remaining piece of garlic sausage left in his provisions. He felt his mouth salivate but daren’t lick his lips in case they froze in the bitter wind of the midnight kingdom.
With a weary shake of his head he turned back to his command and trudged discontentedly back down the snowdrift to his horse. The sausage was all he had left to eat and the Emperor alone knew when fresh provisions would reach Gérard and his elves, indeed when food would reach any part of the Grande Armée.
Mounting his horse, Gérard regarded the small group of hussars, all as hungry as he and wrapped in blankets and cloaks, some stuffed with hay and his charges.
It was hard to believe that there, sat on a mangy pony, was the bane of his life, the Emperor’s personal chef Néjellar Lauson, who together with her servant Keraag André, had somehow become separated from the retreating Elven army and the purpose of the rescue mission Gérard and his regiment had been ordered upon by Morded himself.
Gérard blessed the gods of Armorica that it had not taken long for his patrol to find the aimlessly lost Vivandière and her servant, finding the retreating army was proving more of a problem.
The irony that here he was starving in the benighted Witch-lands with the greatest cook in Valon had not escaped Gérard, Indeed, he mused, it was only her promise to cook her rescuers a magnificent casserole upon regaining the army that kept him going…
Behind Enemy Lines
Just how Néjellar Lauson became lost behind Undead lines is a story unfortunately for another day, suffice to say that she and her manservant became detached from the retreating Elven Grande Armée and required the heroic Etienne Gérard to rescue her (indeed, one might think that she contrived this situation knowing the Emperor would send his best and bravest out to recover his beloved chef).
Having found the errant cook Gérard and his small patrol of 10e Crown Hussars need to regain the Grande Armée and return Néjellar to the Emperor’s custody (and claim the promised reward of one of Néjellar’s legendary casseroles).
The Elves
You are Colonel Etienne Gérard of the 10e Crown Hussars, hero of the Empire and on this mission command a patrol of six hussars:
Colonel Etienne Gérard: Experienced, armed with a Ferach Elf Duelling Pistol, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Seregant Andre Bonhomme de Neige: Experienced, armed with a Ferach Elf Carbine, Ferach Elf Duelling Pistol, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Corporal Claude Gelure: Average, armed with a Ferach Elf Carbine, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Hussar Pierre Perce-neige: Average, armed with Ferach Elf Duelling Pistol, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Hussar Phillip Stalactite: Average, armed with a Ferach Elf Carbine, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Hussar Gerard Congelés: Average, armed with a Ferach Elf Carbine, sword and mounted on a light horse.
Hussar Alphonse Hiver: raw, armed with a Ferach Elf Carbine, sword and mounted. Hiver has magical abilities which should be rolled for as normal before the game begins.
You are escorting...
Néjellar Lauson: Raw, armed with a Standard Pistol and a kitchen knife and mounted on a light horse. Néjellar has magical abilities.
Keraag André: Raw, armed with rolling pin and saucepan (treated as clubs) and mounted on a light horse.
To be successful you need to reach the safety of the Grande Armée with Néjellar Lauson. Any other result is a failure.
For the Umpire’s Eyes Only
In this scenario the Undead are generated randomly and use the solo play rules (Flintoque:DITS, p90; Flintloque: WIC, p.89).
You should instruct the Elven player that he must cross the table chasing after the retreating Grande Armée.
What you don’t tell him is that he may cross the table and not actually have caught up with the Grande Armée yet, if this happens then he needs to cross another one (and potentially another and another etc…)
The Elves must cross the long side of the table. Scenery should be limited but can be randomly placed by the umpire as you see fit (if you think things are going downhill too quickly for the Elves you can introduce straggler reinforcements on any turn – just roll the dice, consult a chart and pretend!)
Each turn as Umpire you roll 2D6 with the following results:
Odd Total – nothing happened (the umpire should play on the Elven players nerves as the game goes on by taking sharp intakes of breath following dice rolls, tuts, oh, hee hee, smirks etc – all good fun)
Even Total – a randomly generated unit of Undead appears (see table below)
Natural Double - Grande Armée spotted at the end of the table. The scenario ends when the Elves reach that table edge (this means the game might only last one table, but potentially could go on a long time).
Random Undead Generation Table:
2: An Experienced KGB Liche with eight 1st Graviski Line Infantry (Standard, Dwarf and Dogmen Zombies as per your miniatures); two Experienced, four Average, two Raw. All armed with Standard Muskets.
3: Experienced Calculating Vampyre with four Average Small Werewolves.
4: Six Pavlova Grenadiers (Bog Orc Zombies); one Experienced, two Average, three Raw. All armed with Standard Muskets. They are accompanied by an Average KGB Liche.
5: Five Zombiski Cossacks (Savant Zombies); one Experienced, one Average, three Raw. All mounted on Zombie Horses and armed with swords.
6: Five Undead Spektrov Cuirassiers (Savant Zombies); two Experienced, three Average. All mounted on Zombie Horses and armed with swords.
7: Two Zombiski Cossacks (Savant Zombies); Both mounted on Zombie Horses and armed with swords.
8: Eight Zoltan 666th Regiment (Undead Dog Zombies); all Average and armed with Standard Muskets. They are accompanied by a KGB Liche and are led by a Wrathful Vampire Dog officer armed with standard pistol and sword.
9: Four Average 1st Guard Liteupski Lancers (Savant Zombies); all Average. Armed with Standard Muskets, mounted on Skeletal Horses.
10: Five Krautian Flesched Legion (Dwarf Zombies); two Average, three Raw. All armed with Mk I Dwarf muskets. They are accompanied by an Average KGB Liche.
11: Four Wolves.
12: Four Graviski Line Infantry (Standard, Dwarf and Dogmen Zombies as per your miniatures); two Average, two Raw. Armed with Corpseov Muskets (Grapeshotte, p.80. They are accompanied by an Experienced KGB Liche.
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Webmaster's Notes
An Orcs in the Webbe Original! "Gérard’s Casserole" was written exclusively for Orcs in the Webbe's 2010 Countdown to Christmas Advent Calendar and was first published on Thursday 2nd December 2010.