“Educate men without religion and you make of them but clever devils.”

Arthur Wellesley, The Duke of Wellington

It’s an extraordinary but true fact that 100% of the wargaming Church of England vicars I know have armies of Orcs. Granted, 2 priests from rural Lincolnshire is hardly representative of the worldwide Anglican community, but what leads these men to take the side of the green skinned hooligans portrayed by Games Workshop? True, the 40K Imperium has more than a whiff of High Church Catholicism, but space Orcs are hardly the agents of a Protestant reformation. Orc ideology has more in common with some of the antics of medieval millennialists, perhaps the Drummer of Niklashausen or the Munster Anabaptist. Perhaps the Bishop should be told.  You can read Norman Cohn’s “The Pursuit of the Millennium” for more on the proto-David Koreshs of the Middle Ages, lots of wargaming potential here and one ill-armed mob of fanatical religious peasants is pretty much the same as another. Pendraken even do figures in 10mm. 

You might find the idea of rustic prelates siding with the forces of chaos somewhat disturbing. This said Jesus was pretty big on sinners, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners" he said (Mark, 2:13-17). Still I don’t think the religious in question are actually trying to convert their lead horde (the Lincolnshire Fens are weird, but not that weird). I suspect the answer is that their sons play Space Marines and they need an opponent. It has often troubled me that people play the “bad guys” in wargames. I find enthusiastic supporters of the Waffen SS particularly hard to stomach, especially those with “Adolf Hitler European Tour” T-shirts. Of course, we need active opponents like the vicar’s, playing the bad guys. I just wish they wouldn’t enjoy it so much.

My own gaming this month has been somewhat shorten by the mad rush that is the end of the school term. A weekend of 42 hours gaming and 6 hours sleep at the Conference of Wargamers (COW) over the weekend of the 3rd and 4th July has left me physically exhausted by mentally fired up for a summer of games design. Some old games are going to have a (major) makeover and some wholly new projects will be born.  More of which next Tale.

Matthew Hartley
June 2010