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The Illustrated Londinium Times: Borke Wins Award ! |
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Tuesday, 18 December 2007 00:00 |
Our noble and courageous War Correspondent, Michael Borke, was yesterday awarded the prestigeous Pullover Prize for his outstanding coverage of the Catalucian War.
His tireless dedication to get the facts about the situation in Catalucia has resulted in the Illustrated Londinium Tymes being the foremost voice of truth and reason reporting on the war.
Borke first dipped his nib into the inky world of journalism at an early age, contributing to a magazine for the private school he attended in Borcshire. His commitment to honest journalism and the public interest found him in conflict with the governing authorities of the school. After submitting articles about the close friendship of his married Headmaster and the cleaning lady, Borke found himself on the wrong end of an expulsion order. Though he had left under a cloud, Michael did not hesitate to continue his search for the facts. Working on a freelance basis, he first hit the headlines with what became the turning point in journalistic accomplishment in our fair country.
His story about the suspicious financial dealings of the notorious Tory MP, Geoffry Archorc, first raised the question of sleaze within the government of Albion. Describing his subject as a “liar, a cheat and a common crook”, Borke quickly found himself in court for his revealing story. Justice Archorc, brother of the offended politician, fined Borke for these “slanderous allegations.” However, his name was now on the gnarled lips of every hack in the country, and the Illustrated Londinium Tymes seized its opportunity to acquire the greatest reporter in the country.
He went to Catalucia at the outbreak of hostilities, and has steadfastly brought back unbiased accounts of the brave deeds of our troops. Articles like “Ferach Scum Get Kicking They So Richly Deserve” and “Albion Is Better Than Armorica” accurately describe the performance of our boys, while “Evil Elves Cull Children” and “Merciless Mordred Murders Millions” give us an insight into the truely despicable minds of our enemies. Augustus Fartsagale, Acting Commander-in-Chief of Albion forces in Catalucia, said “Borke is a genius! He seems to know more about our troop movements than we do, and all I can say is that I’m glad he’s writing for our side. Just imagine the disasterous consequences if Borke turned out to be a spy. Ha!”
Webmaster's Notes
This was originally published on the original Alternative Armies Flintloque website. |
